My IVF Story: Day 3 “Birth Control Begins” |
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In the infertility world, everything happens on a day 3. Day 1 is important because you just got your period or negative pregnancy test. Day 2 is clearly not important and day 3 is where things start to happen. The pregnant woman charts her pregnancy using weeks; the infertile woman charts her cycle using days. So it’s my day 3 which means I have a ridiculously early morning blood and ultrasound appointment, and will later start the birth control pill for the first time in 10 years. I haven’t used birth control since my crazy high school days – those were the good old days when you actually wanted to prevent a pregnancy. Boy. Things have changed. I get up at 6:30am and head to my appointment. I have been to my clinic enough times to know the protocol. Find a vein, take blood, change into a gown, spread your legs, right side…quiet….left side….quiet. I’m free to go. The fertility doctor tells me that I will take my birth control pill for the next few weeks, and then start my fertility injections mid-month. As I leave, there is another woman standing beside me in the elevator. We both have the same “Oh my God, what am doing?” expression plastered on our faces. “Infertility is really awesome.” I say to fill the awkward silence. She gives me a half smile but clearly cannot wait to leave the elevator and the strange infertile woman standing beside her. Maybe I caught her during a bad moment which happens a lot at my fertility clinic. I am an experienced infertility gal, but I am a brand new IVFer. We newbie’s are fearful of this treatment because we don’t know what it’s really like. Here is a few things that I am currently obsessing about: • Drug side effects. • Oh my God, they are putting me to sleep. • Will I feel sick or throw up? I hate that. • What if the treatment doesn’t work? Reading other bloggers personal stories actually doesn’t help me that much. I want to hear a personal story where the entire treatment was a fabulous experience, the person had zero side effects and everything resulted in a happy pregnancy. Instead, you hear negative stories and no one seems to admit that they had a great time. What I can say is, it’s day 3 and everything is fine so far. No side effects from the birth control pill and life continues. All I can do is take it one day at a time from here. Comments (4)
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The Good Days There are good days, there are always good days, but it is only on the bad days that we need to share, that we need to express our emotions and that we need to tell what happened, why we are feeling the way we are feeling, and ask for someone somewhere to make us feel just that squigie bit better - someone to tell us it will be okay. And it is, no matter what happens, it is always okay in the end. Maybe in IVF the lows outweigh the highs, but there are high's, i promise. Friday the 13th for me was a high, they put my embryo back in me. Yes there was anxiety, and yes there were moments in the day where i wished so hard it wasnt me, but that day that moment when i walked out of the clinic, all i could think of was the hope, the joy the possibilities that this offered me. Maybe, maybe just maybe in 12 days time i will be pregnant. This may be the one little fighter that brings DH and i all our joys, makes all our dreams come true. That there, that is hope, and that is the high in IVF. And Naomi, hope is the reason we have our good days - hope, just hope. If it is one thing i have learnt over the past 63 days it is to remember that this is your story, and you can make it as hopeful, enjoyable, and positive as you want to make it. Have faith, and remember that IVF means hope. |
pleaseletthisbeit
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hang in there sweetie Naomi, Congrats on starting on your IVF journey and for being on day 3! You are doing the right thing to take it one day at the time, don't even try to think ahead it will only overwhelm you sweetie. For my first cycle CD 2 was the day it all began. I did a short protocol what they call the most powerful IVF protocol (or what I call the last chance saloon before egg donation!) Anyway, I started just like you, with tons of questions and worried of all the procedures and side effects. To tell you the truth, my IVF cycle in itself, the actual drug taking and ER/ET stages were smooth sailing. I didn't have any side effects, the injections even thought they were all IMs did not hurt as much as I thought and being under for the ER was not bad at all, it was much worse for my poor DH who saw it all! Bless him! I got more eggs than expected and all of them expect one were mature and all fertilised. I was lucky enough to see the whole fertilisation process as my RE has a camera in the lab connected to a tv in the recovery room. It was a truly amazing experience and we were both in tears by the end! My ET was spiritual, when our doctor told us to look at the screen and she pointed to little round things, we knew those were our possible babies in there!! I am not going to lie to you, the next part for me was the worst. The 2ww went really slow for me and my reaction to progesterone was very strong so I got all the pregnancy sign without being pregnant. It was tough as I didn't know what to expect. The BFN at end of the 2ww was devastating and heartbreaking. What I am trying to tell you is that like '100daysofIVF" said, there are many highs and many lows in IVF, so cherish all the highs and remember that even at your lowest low there is always hope that the next cycle or another drug or procedure will grant you your wish. |
InfertileNaomi
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... Wow. Those were amazing comments. I am a bit speechless. I really appreciate them and think that other women will benefit too. Thanks for reminding me how truly amazing IVF is and thinking of the procedure as a spiritual event rather than a fearful one. IVF does mean hope, and I have enough hope for anyone and everyone who has run out of it. |
Karen T
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... If you want a story where everything went well, well I have one. Our first IVF was a success (currently 25 weeks), absolutely everything went smoothly and I had NO side effects. The only "bad" parts were that I slept for a whole day straight after the egg retrieval and I had to keep doing the progesterone shots until 12 weeks. I should have taken the day after the ER off of work; I just didn't expect the anesthesia to affect me so strongly, but in a way it was kinda nice to relax and sleep  I had no pain from the ER or ET and after the embryo transfer I worked from home and then went to work the next day. But even if I had had horrible pain or side effects, when I found out I was pregnant it wouldn't have mattered one bit. Yeah, the prog shots sucked but I would do them the whole pregnancy if I had to. Feeling my baby move around and react to my husbands voice is so amazing. I know we were super lucky to have a successful first IVF; every day I am thankful. I really hope it happens for you too! |
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