Isolation

One of the many survival methods I used while struggling with my infertility was isolation. It was easier, at times, to separate myself from others rather than deal with the emotions that could bubble up to the surface at random moments. Isolation was something I practiced a lot at work, especially when I was having a hard day. I am only now realizing how much I truly isolated myself at work. This week has been my first back from summer break. I was very excited to share my news with my co-workers and when I told them about my pregnancy they were all very excited for me. Most of them have some idea that it has taken us a long time to get pregnant, but very few really know the whole story.

During the last 2 years of trying to conceive, I pulled even farther away from my colleagues. Last year, I spent most of my time in my classroom and sometimes even had lunch in there alone. I did this to protect myself from questions, but now I am finding that I am longing for the company of others. I have spent so much time hiding that my friendships have suffered. Now I am wondering if it is too late to create new relationships with my coworkers. Will being pregnant help me reach out?

As for BB s/he seems to be doing just fine. I am surprised each week with new pregnancy symptoms. I am looking forward to leaving the morning sickness behind but it has served as a great reassurance that BB is doing well. I can’t believe my first trimester is almost over. Where has the time gone?